I feel so erratic and out of control. Most nights I lay in bed and I just end up crying thinking about all the weight on me and with no outlet to fully express what I think or feel, never taught to do anything except be content, even without a bed or rights or the ability to hold an opinion out of fear of it being the wrong thing it’s so hard to convey any thought unless to my siblings and how do you tell them that at night you think about suicide letters and not in the romantic I think about mortality way but the I’d like to rid myself of responsibility and hurt and pain and life. There is no point to life, just an endless string of meaningless actions leading up to your death that will truly only mean something to a hand full of people. So before I get really attached to anything or anyone attached to me I’d like to be able to call it quits. To stop wondering and running around looking for a place to call my own. To stop worrying about everything for a minute long enough to finally just stop and die. And as cliche as it may sound and fucked up, I can’t disappoint people if I’m dead.

sixpenceee
sixpenceee:

Last summer, I researched a couple things and they made my life better. Why not share it?
Feel free to add to this list, I’m sure there are those who are an expert at this stuff. 
Emergency pimple that you need to get rid of ASAP
1) Soak a cotton ball in apple cider vinegar. It’s recommended that you dilute your apple cider vinegar if your skin is sensitive. 2) Hold the soaked cotton ball onto pimples GENTLY (don’t press hard) for at least 5 minutes! 3) Dab apple cider vinegar on your pimples through out the day. 4) Let the apple cider dry. Results: By nighttime or the next day, your pimple should shrink or disappear provided you persistently dabbed it repeatedly 
Don’t do this often, it can aggravate your skin*
Facial scrub
There are many you can do. Here are 10 of them. 
For longer, thicker eyelashes
Apply vaseline on your eyelashes before you sleep. You can also use a clean mascara brush and dip it in some almond, olive or coconut oil and apply it on your eyelashes. 
To get rid of dark elbows and knees
Use a lemon and squeeze it until you get the juice out. Use cotton balls to soak them in the lemon juice and then apply all over your knees and elbows. Leave them it on for a couple minures, then using a warm washcloth scrub it off. 
For baby smooth skin
Use 2 teaspoons of yogurt, 1 teaspoon of milk and honey, 3 teaspoons of flour and mix all together and apply on your face. Leave it for 30 minutes and wash it off. 
For lighter skin
Wanna get rid of that summer tan or even out your skin tone? Squeeze lemon juice again but remember to dilute it. Never put direct lemon juice onto your face. Mix this with some sugar. Use it as a scrub. Leave it on your face for no more than 5 minutes. The same can be done for your body. 
For silky hair
Apply olive oil/coconut oil to your hair. Make sure you get it deep into those roots. Leave on for 30 minutes up to 1 hour and wash it off with shampoo and conditioner
For whiter teeth
Sprinkle some baking soda on your toothbrush and brush using gentle, circular motions. I’d watch out if you had gum sensitivity though. Old wives’ recipes often state that a paste of baking powder, a little salt, and a few drops of white vinegar, works effectively. 
For cleaner nails
Just scrub your nails with a loofah and use a toothpick to take out dirt.

sixpenceee:

Last summer, I researched a couple things and they made my life better. Why not share it?

Feel free to add to this list, I’m sure there are those who are an expert at this stuff. 

Emergency pimple that you need to get rid of ASAP

1) Soak a cotton ball in apple cider vinegar. It’s recommended that you dilute your apple cider vinegar if your skin is sensitive. 
2) Hold the soaked cotton ball onto pimples GENTLY (don’t press hard) for at least 5 minutes! 
3) Dab apple cider vinegar on your pimples through out the day. 
4) Let the apple cider dry. 
Results: By nighttime or the next day, your pimple should shrink or disappear provided you persistently dabbed it repeatedly 

Don’t do this often, it can aggravate your skin*

Facial scrub

There are many you can do. Here are 10 of them. 

For longer, thicker eyelashes

Apply vaseline on your eyelashes before you sleep. You can also use a clean mascara brush and dip it in some almond, olive or coconut oil and apply it on your eyelashes

To get rid of dark elbows and knees

Use a lemon and squeeze it until you get the juice out. Use cotton balls to soak them in the lemon juice and then apply all over your knees and elbows. Leave them it on for a couple minures, then using a warm washcloth scrub it off. 

For baby smooth skin

Use 2 teaspoons of yogurt, 1 teaspoon of milk and honey, 3 teaspoons of flour and mix all together and apply on your face. Leave it for 30 minutes and wash it off. 

For lighter skin

Wanna get rid of that summer tan or even out your skin tone? Squeeze lemon juice again but remember to dilute it. Never put direct lemon juice onto your face. Mix this with some sugar. Use it as a scrub. Leave it on your face for no more than 5 minutes. The same can be done for your body. 

For silky hair

Apply olive oil/coconut oil to your hair. Make sure you get it deep into those roots. Leave on for 30 minutes up to 1 hour and wash it off with shampoo and conditioner

For whiter teeth

Sprinkle some baking soda on your toothbrush and brush using gentle, circular motions. I’d watch out if you had gum sensitivity though. Old wives’ recipes often state that a paste of baking powder, a little salt, and a few drops of white vinegar, works effectively. 

For cleaner nails

Just scrub your nails with a loofah and use a toothpick to take out dirt.

itscold-itslate

Every day with you
I was made weak.
Not in the way that
Romantic teenagers
Talk about love,
but in the way
that you belittled me,
abused me,
warped my views,
and turned me against
myself.

So when I miss you,
I know I am missing
a part of myself;
the innocence
of unconditional love.
But I can feel
The razors edge,
that is the pain,
the scars, the fear,
you kindly left
with me,
when you
decided

I
wasn’t
enough.

One Year Later (18 March 2014)